not necessarily a bad day, but just one of those days.
i'm actually in a fine mood - just have lots of things stirring around in this crazy brain of mine.
i just did this. and it did make me feel better. i'm a bit of a "butter" junkie.
ya know what i hate about life? rigidity. i hate having to follow a "schedule" of how life should be. it infuriates me and makes me feel trapped. it's not me. i like to consider myself a free spirit. i, for the most part, like to flow through life happily and do what makes me happy at any given second of any given day. sometimes when i'm bogged down by a schedule, i start to rebel.
and that's exactly what's been going on. i've not run according to my training schedule in weeks. the whole schedule of it all is annoying me. it's not that i can't commit - i can. i just hate feeling like i have to do something. i want to do things, but when i want to do them. so i might be crawling across the finish line come october, but i swear from this day on i'm not forcing myself to do anything i don't want to do. except wake up for work on a monday morning.
i like to be that person. the happy person who laughs and has fun. not the person silently bitching to themselves about how i need to run later, then do laundry, then pull weeds, etc etc etc. especially when what i really want is to sit on my couch and watch the olympics (which is what i did in the end anyway!)
like it said, it's one of those days. when i hate running, hate my schedule for running, hate being busy every single weekend from now until october, hate 90 degree weather, hate laundry & hate everything else that clouds my life.
i remember this one day, it was chilly but not cold. it was sunny. i was hiking on one of my favorite hiking trails with josh & our dog we used to have. his name was hoagie and he was the definition of free spirit. that little guy was craaaaazy. but in the best way possible. he was the happiest thing i've known. on that day, we hiked, we soaked in the sunshine. that day i thought about how good life can be. how lucky i was. i wasn't thinking about having to do anything. not laundry, not running, not planning extravagant meals. just the air, the trees, the sun, and two of the guys i loved most in life.
i have a way of putting way to much on my plate and worrying about stuff that does not matter in the grand scheme of things. it's one of those days that i fully accept that i need to slow it down, turn it back a notch and enjoy life. if that means not doing laundry for a week, then whatever, the world will not end.
anyone else have days like these? any suggestions for "slowing down"?